Can Purell be used as lube?
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
