K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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