I seem to have left my pride at pride
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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