remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
they're like a gay fantastic four
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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