it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
