You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
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there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
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I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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