Swine flu. Run for my life!
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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