I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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