you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
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