is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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