Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
