Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Randomize
