sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
