Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
NoShamevember. You game?
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize