If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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