just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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