The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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