Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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