apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
