Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I stole a fireplace last night.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
