he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
that is very illegal...i love you.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
