I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
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oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
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I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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