How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
