he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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