Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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