its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
