Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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