yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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