He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
