Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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