in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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