i think my tv is drunk
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
