I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Randomize
