addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize