North Korea, Best Korea!
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I am mentally ready for anal.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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