you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I'm both gender and math confused
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