North Korea, Best Korea!
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
soo... how was my night?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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