Your face is a jimmy john
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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