you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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