Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
