Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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