Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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