How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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