I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Randomize
