do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
