I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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