Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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