I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA