Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
