So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Randomize
